When Is The Right Time?

When Is The Right Time?

I am blessed with two wonderful daughters, 12 and 17. Our oldest is a senior in high school and will be leaving for college in eight months. Is she ready to be out in the world on her own? I hope so, and I hope I am ready as well. So when is the right time to talk to your kids about certain topics? It’s always the right time, although parents will have to play their part.

Every year, our school has a two day leadership summit in December. We put together a variety of activities that connect leadership, character, and service. This year we concentrated on diversity. Not just cultural diversity but diverse perception, thinking, gender, and a variety of topics that connect us all to each other or disengage us from each other. We certainly stirred up a lot of emotion and creative thinking this year generating some dialogue for home. 

We placed a map of the world in the lobby and asked everyone to stick a pin to indicate their ancestry. We represented every continent except Antarctica. This was an icebreaker to allow the students to see how different and alike we are as an organization. 

We planned for months to get the right speakers, create enough activities, and make correlations to everything we were doing. We searched around the country, and I felt comfortable with two speakers I contacted several times in email and on the phone. Both were highly recommended. I received grants from our education foundation and our PTO. We knew it wouldn’t be perfect but we knew we would stir emotions; burst bubbles, and create different ways of looking at the world. 

As an educator, I wanted to create experiences that our students didn’t have. As a parent, I wanted the students to be comfortable in their own skin and make changes if they were not. We set up four assemblies the first day: fifth and sixth grades, seventh and eighth grades, staffulty, and parents. 

The first day speaker, Calvin Terrell, was intelligent, serious when he had to be, funny, and entertaining. He brought his experiences with Native Americans, hate groups, and everyday observations. He demonstrated our human ability to be manipulated, be different, and our capacity to follow our heart. 

Everyone is born to think creatively without prejudice. It is only when we put parameters, negative influence, or control their thinking that we stifle their progression. We created a lot of dialogue that was promoted in the classes for the rest of the day. For instance, reflective writing, thank you notes, and discussion. We promoted the students to talk to their parents when they went home and ask them to attend the nighttime assembly.

The second day speaker, Cammy Nelson, specializes in girls’ leadership and self-image. While the females were training, the boys had a plethora of activities that related to them. The events were set up as a nice transition from the previous day.   Both sides participated in martial arts, team building, and small group discussion. The boys built a remembrance tree for a local grieving support organization. (This is the shortened version). 

As a parent, I always initiate meaningful dialogue with my daughters. However, I get the same standard answers that you get. I wish my daughters had experienced what our students and staffulty did for the past two days. My family did get to meet Mr. Terrell at dinner. They have also met Ms. Nelson at a national leadership conference. For that, I am grateful.

As an educator, I am thankful for the commitment and hard work of all our stakeholders in our efforts to create a whole child and today’s leaders. I am proud of our students and their reactions to the two days and their reactions to the intensity of our speakers.( I forgot to mention the food for Diversity Day, next time.) 

We received a plethora of feedback. This email sums our efforts up very well. 

Dr. Rudnesky,

I wanted to take a moment to thank you and whoever brought Mr. Terrell in to speak with the kids yesterday. My girls were shaken up, amazed and inspired by Mr. Terrell's powerful words.

It takes a lot for my, at times, typically cynical and jaded teenager to engage and feel moved by something or someone.

One daughter could not stop talking about the way Mr. Terrell made them all think so differently about the way we look at the world. While our other daughter my shy girl, felt empowered enough to actually get up and speak in front of the assembly.

We feel blessed to have the girls in such an excellent school for many reasons. These out of the box experiences are some that they will take with them and always remember.

Thank you for your continued dedication and enthusiasm. Enjoy the holidays with your family.

Sincerely,

A parent